119 – Mariel – “I need to know if God has given up on me.”
“First sir I’d like to say thank you for answering my question so quickly especially since you are out of the country. In the recording you sent you told me to ask God, and he would reveal to me what’s wrong. Sir I have asked God so many times and have not gotten a clear answer. At this point I don’t even know if I’m really born again and on my worst days, I feel like God doesn’t want me. I have cried out so many times to him , I’ve apologized to people in my past I’ve hurt (the ones I could find) I’ve confessed and repented all my sins to God. I’ve talked to so many pastors, preachers and evangelist (who were all nice people) but to be honest I feel dead inside to the point of wondering if God has given up on me. After watching one of your videos (my husband and I are taking the John 7:17 challenge) and from what others have told me about spiritual warfare I figured out I’m being tormented.
I have only been a real Christian for a little over a year (I was a fake Christian before and yes I am ashamed of many things ) I can count on one hand the times I’ve felt Gods presence. Please I need to know if God has given up on me and if so, what do I do now? I still truly believe in him to the point I’d be willing to die for him. I’m terrified of going to hell so much, so I get panic attacks and the thoughts in my head ( prideful , selfish blasphemous thoughts also voices telling to give up and that God has given up on me ) scare me . When I do sleep, I get nightmares and dreams about demons. After watching your videos, I know without a doubt there is a deeper walk with God, and I ( and my husband ) truly want that relationship with the Lord. Please ask God if it’s too late for me. Thanking you in advance Mariel.”
Tormented by Doubt? Unlocking the Power of Forgiveness
Doubt. A shadowy figure that creeps into our minds, whispering lies and seeking to devour our faith. It questions God's goodness, His plan, even our salvation. Like the devil tempting Jesus in the desert, these doubts can feel relentless, shaking the very foundation of our belief.
But just as Mariel needed to hear, there is a powerful weapon against the darkness of doubt: forgiveness. It may seem counterintuitive, especially when wrestling with questions of faith, but unforgiveness can blind us to spiritual truths and leave us vulnerable to the enemy's attacks.
Matthew 6:14-15 states, "For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins." Unforgiveness creates a spiritual blockage, hindering our relationship with God and clouding our vision. It's like trying to see through a dirty window; the light struggles to get through.
Christ's parable in Matthew 18:21-35 paints a stark picture of the consequences of unforgiveness. The servant who was forgiven a massive debt refused to forgive a fellow servant a much smaller one. The result? He was handed over to tormentors. This story highlights the importance of extending the same grace we have received.
Forgiving from the heart, as Jesus commands, doesn't mean condoning the wrong. It means releasing the debt owed to us and trusting God to be the ultimate judge. It means choosing to see with His eyes, recognizing that even in our pain, He is working for our good. Luke 11:34 tells us, "Your eye is the lamp of your body. When your eyes are good, your whole body also is full of light. But when they are bad, your body also is full of darkness." Forgiveness cleanses our spiritual vision, allowing God's light to shine through.
If you are struggling with doubt, examine your heart. Is there unforgiveness lurking in the shadows? Ask God to help you release any bitterness or resentment, trusting in His justice and timing. As you forgive, you will begin to see more clearly, and the darkness of doubt will give way to the radiant light of faith.
